So... it's time.

A lot of things, I must get off my chest. Literally. Physically. Completely. Wholly. Truly. Why? Because I must protect myself. When being pulled in different directions, it is difficult to know where to go: find your footing. You take one step at a time. Pick up the pieces, get back together. I will not concentrate on the difficulty of this task but merely accept it and move on. That is what life has taught me. One person cannot mean so many different things. At least, that is what makes sense right now. Letting go. But I cannot completely let go. Why? (It seems) From this standpoint, all my life people have defined me. Why? I did not speak up. Why? I was not confident enough. Why? I questioned Myself. Ah. Note to self: stop doing that. My instincts may lead me in many directions. But there is an uncertain force that brings me back to alignment. Makes me feel balanced. Like a Libran. Which I am. Hmmm...

Definitions

And so it starts - I pull up a chair, stretch out my limbs and think. Think. Not worry, not imagine, not plan or be pressured by people, expectations... anything. I realise it's been a while since I did that; just snip the strings... and think.

Yes. Now that I am absolute; outside it all, I find clarity. And I find myself being pulled back to reality as my father calls my name. I am Reshma. What's in a name, I wonder? Mine has a remote connection to silk; smoothness. I like the sound of that. I like my name, I realise. And how it defines me.

How do you go about defining a person, though? Not by their connections and the roles they play; that is too variable. Not by their actions; that too is inconsistent. What is it, then, that defines a human being? Makes them who they are? Their essence lies... in their intent, perhaps?

I am baffled (clearly) but I'm glad I took the first step. Out of the corner of my mind, a door creaks; beckoning me. I smile to myself in content. I've begun... at last!